What are the most hilarious quotes by Michael Scott from The Office?

You might've seen memes of Steve Carell as Michael Scott all over the internet and related to him on a spiritual level, or perhaps you're just baffled at what he has to say next. These memorable Michael Scott quotes will have you laughing out loud and wondering what goes on inside Michael's head!

SR
asked by Sabrina Rain Samson - Binge.co Contributor
  1. #1

    "I declare bankruptcy!"

    On the episode of the fourth season of The Office titled Money, Michael Scott is facing a huge dilemma. He is struggling to juggle two jobs and bring income after he and Jan's impulsive spending. Since Michael is looking to ease his financial woes, he consults Creed Bratton who tells him to declare bankruptcy to alleviate his problem. Although, Michael takes it literally and screams "I declare bankruptcy!" to everyone at the office.

    19votes
    • Sarah WaltersWritten on October 20, 2019
      SW
      "This is so FUNNY and I just watch the clip of Michael screaming I DECLARE BANKRUPTCY!!!!! to cheer me up! The whole scene from Creed telling him declaring bankruptcy will solve his problems and how he actually takes it literally LITERALLY MAAAAAAN"
  2. #2

    "Webster's Dictionary defines wedding as the fusing of two metals with a hot torch."

    During Phyllis's wedding midway to the third season of The Office, Michael Scott gave a wedding speech like no other and it's unforgettable in a way that he totally jumbles the definitions of words. He defines the ceremony straight from the dictionary with, "Webster's Dictionary defines wedding as the fusing of two metals with a hot torch." What rhymes with the word wedding? Then he awkwardly adds, "Well you know something? I think you guys are two metals, gold medals."

    11votes
    • Justin WagnerWritten on October 20, 2019
      JW
      "Michael Scott is my favorite character in the office and he has a lot of funny lines but his wedding speech just takes the cake as the funniest! This is how I want my wedding speech to go, it can't go any other way HAHAHA"
  3. #3

    "Would I rather be feared or loved? Um, easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me."

    Michael Scott is one who gives unexpectedly interesting quips which actually comes to no surprise despite his tendency to misquote. One of these quips is taken from the sixth episode of the second season of The Office where Michael shows Dwight who's the boss. When asked if he wanted to be loved or feared as a leader in the final interview, Michael gives a brief yet wise answer. "Would I rather be feared or loved? Um, easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me." Mind = blown!

    6votes
    • Teresa RussellWritten on October 20, 2019
      TR
      "ladies and gentlemen, this is my senior yearbook quote from the legend michael scott himself, no one can change my mind!!!"

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  1. #4

    "That's what she said"

    "That's what she said" has become a joke associated with Michael Scott for the whole duration of The Office. He says "That's what she said" at every given opportunity he can. Sometimes, he adapts the quote to fit the situation. Case in point, he says "That's what he said" to Oscar, an openly gay accountant in one episode and he adds, "Right guys, cause of gay?". The recurring line is also his first and last quote on the show the first being humorous and the last, emotional.

    3votes
    • Jacqueline CruzWritten on October 20, 2019
      JC
      "since i started watching the office, thanks to michael i can't stop saying "that's what she said" now!!! and then i do this snort that's embarrassing luv ngl"
  2. #5

    "Sometimes I'll start a sentence, and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way. Like an improv conversation ... an improversation."

    More often than not, Michael Scott's memorable moments on The Office come from saying nonsensical things. In the fifth season's episode titled The Duel, David Wallace wants the opinion of Michael and the former ends up interviewing the latter. Michael begins to ramble about his philosophy which goes on for 40 seconds of him saying whatever comes upon his mind, even though what he's saying doesn't make sense. This is what he calls an "improversation"

    3votes
    • Bryan ButlerWritten on October 20, 2019
      BB
      "I do improversations when I have to write an academic essay with 1000 words djkdjlsdf i just hope I winged it!"
  3. #6

    "Guess what? I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don't know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me."

    Michael is known to get away from trouble with his salesman skills however sometimes that just doesn't work out for him. On the episode, Fun Run from The Office's fourth season, Michael accidentally hits Meredith Palmer with his car. This causes everyone in the workplace to be displeased. To salvage what he had done, he says that he has flaws albeit worded in a way that is favored to him. After saying this quote, he clarifies that he actually doesn't want to be sued.

    2votes
    • Gary WhiteWritten on October 20, 2019
      GW
      "This Michael Scott quote has got to be me on a daily basis."
  4. #7

    "Where are the turtles?"

    This short yet memorable quote by salesman Michael Scott is taken from The Office's fourth season episode titled Dunder Mifflin Infinity. After a frustrating day of clients not giving back despite Michael offering them gift baskets, Michael finally snaps. Along with Dwight, Michael storms back to an ex-client they last gave a basket and asked the client to return it. What makes Michael angry is the fact that the basket was already opened and it was missing chocolate turtles and in a rage, he goes, "WHERE ARE THE TURTLES?!!!"

    2votes
    • Alexander HernandezWritten on October 20, 2019
      AH
      "i have such a bad temper so seeing this scene kinda reminded me of myself lol. the way i scream over the most trivial things except im not as awesome as michael scott LOL"
  5. #8

    "I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious"

    Aside from Michael's "flaws" after hitting Meredith with his car, another underrated quote from the Fun Run episode of The Office was a short but memorable classic line "I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious" in regards with the "curse" that caused him to hit Meredith with his vehicle. This line is one of many of Michael Scott's attempts at creating new words and mashing existing ones together.

    1votes
    • Christine RossWritten on October 20, 2019
      CR
      "Out of all the michael scott quotes, this be lost in them all. Like how are yall for not constantly referencing this line. this be my life motto"

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Summary

Best What are the most hilarious quotes by Michael Scott from The Office
RankSolutionsTypeVotesPrice
1"I declare bankruptcy!"Other 19 Paid
2"Webster's Dictionary defines wedding as the fusing of two metals with a hot torch."Other 11 Paid
3"Would I rather be feared or loved? Um, easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me."Other 6 Paid
4"That's what she said"Other 3 Paid
5"Sometimes I'll start a sentence, and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way. Like an improv conversation ... an improversation."Other 3 Paid
6"Guess what? I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don't know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me."Other 2 Paid
7"Where are the turtles?"Other 2 Paid
8"I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious"Other 1 Paid
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